Today was the first day of Tax Prep in Detroit. I have to say that I was excited. For some reason I woke up at 6:30A, showered, and made the 2 hour drive to MexicanTown to do some tax prep. Trouble is, Google wanted me dead! The instructions they gave me were really cryptic. At one point I went down a deserted street where I could tell a car had been broken into not too earlier than when I drove down that same street. Usually I travel with such hits as Mariah, Kylie, and Whitney. When I witnessed the broken glass in the street, I immediately turned on Where The Hood At. Hey, I wanted to look like I actually belonged in the neighborhood I was in.
The tax prep went really well. I only had one client and I'm actually sitting here blogging because I have some time before the next person shows up. I was proud of myself. I got to practice some of my spanish and I was happy that I was able to get a woman a tax return. Sure, her return was over $1000.00. but when you think about the income that her family lives on for an entire year, $1000.00 really isn't that much.
I just got back from the bathroom. I know. That detail was worth it. I kinda knew that the neighborhood that I'm in is a bit suspect, but while upstairs wandering around for the bathroom, the front desk clerk let this guy in. I didn't mean to stare, but the kid looked bad. He was clutching his arm, was bent over, and upon closer examination, I saw that his lip was puffy and a bit bloody. This kid just had the shit kicked out of him. I've been in a few fights before when I was a kid, but I have never kicked anyones ass nor have I had my ass kicked. I was able to witness first hand what it looks like to get your ass kicked. I didn't talk to the kid beacause it wasn't any of my business, but no matter what happened to him, at least he was smart enough to seek scantuary at the chruch. Seeing that kid made me more sure that I never want to get in a fight. No matter how glorious it looks, if you're the one who comes out on bottom, that whole situation seems mighty scary!
The story about the Super Bowl Weekend is below. But check out this story first!
Ok, hopefully I’ll have some energy later on this week to tell you about my Super Bowl party. It was really fun and I have tons of stories to tell. But first, I’ll start you out with my walk of shame this morning.
I met him on Sunday night at the Super Bowl party I was attending. I was sitting with Jules & Roomie when he walked up to me and we started talking. Being a bit intoxicated, I believe the first words out of mouth were, “I don’t fuck boys under 30.” To which he replied, “I’m 29.” I looked him up and down. He was cute. “I think I can make an exception for you.” We talked for a while and his friend came up to chat with us. His friend was cute too. My guy told me that he lived in (Fabulous) Ferndale and my spirits dropped a little. Earlier in the night I picked up a gay guy not knowing that he was gay. I thought I had picked up another gay guy and his partner. I asked my guy if he was gay and he laughed and told me he wasn’t. At least he had a sense of humor.
Jules, Rommie, and I were sitting down trying to sober up. The party we were at had unlimited food and alcohol for about 12 hours, so you know we were pretty drunk. We finally sobered up and went to the guy’s house (I’ll get to his name in a minute. Be patient.). It was cool. He and his friend shared a duplex. It was actually a pretty nice setup. It was like they were roommates, but they weren’t. We all headed up to my guy’s friend’s part of the house and watched TV. My guy and I were shamelessly making out on the couch. He was a very good kisser for a guy under 30. Soon it was nearing 3A and I had to get Roomie back to the Lansing airport for her 6A flight. (That didn’t happen. But that’s another story too.) So as Jules and Roomie leave to go out to the car, my guy ambushes me and we do one of those crazy hasty make out, throw me down, knock stuff off tables and make a lot of racket routines. Subtle. I told him that I had to bring Jules back to the Detroit Airport later on that day and maybe we could hook up while I was in town.
Cut to Monday. Fortunately I was smart enough to take Monday off work. After dropping Jules at the airport, I trucked it back to my guy’s place. We were both pretty tired. We both got two hours of sleep. He told me he went to bed shortly after we left, but had to be up at 6A for an early meeting. Always thoughtful, my guy picked up a couple movies (Wedding Crashers & 40 Year Old Virgin) and we settled in on the couch where we both fell asleep. I’m telling you, this story is H-O-T.
So cutting the part that is very interesting, but I’m not going to tell you about….we get to my guy’s name. So, we’re in bed, It’s like 8P, and he’s got his shirt off, and I’m scratching his back, when it hits me. He’s so soft. His skin feels softer than mine. So I ask him about it. “Do you moisturize or have some kind of religious daily trip to the spa? Your skin is so soft.” He tells me that he uses Dove and that’s about it. Then I finally figure it out. The man is HAIRLESS! Well, I mean, he had two full heads of hair (think about it) but other than that, his chest, his back, everything was hairless. So, I think we’ll call him The Hairless Man (THM).
So even though THM and I went to bed at about 6P last night, I didn’t leave his house until 8A this morning. I called into work and left a very cryptic message about how I was held up in Detroit, booked it home, changed clothes, doused myself in perfume, and grabbed a coffee at Beaners. I was one and a half hour late. I hadn’t been in the office for three minutes when my boss called. He asked me about the status of a project, I did some bullshitting, and he was none the wiser that I snuck into the office not three minutes before he called.
And how was my weekend with THM? It was very good. I thought we only had a nice time on Sunday night because we were both still intoxicated. But after spending time with him on Monday, I learned that even sober, not only was he an excellent kisser, but I got to cuddle up in his soft and silky skin. I’m so glad that I’m volunteering with the Detroit Alumni Club next weekend. It’ll give me an excuse to conveniently be in town to see him again.
More stories to come…..