Thursday, September 29, 2005 


Mama Kiki: My boyfriend is a vegetarian but doesn't eat vegetables. Do you have suggestions for some books/recipes I could use to make some delicious meals?

Kim O'Donnel: So he's a carbo-tarian? Let me count the ways to make great mashed potato and icecream casserole...What DOES he eat?

The veggie, non veggie question: I commiserate with situation where meals are made for two people one veggie and one non-veggie. Over the summer I was spending a lot of time with my mother helping her move and while she likes veggies enough, she's not a vegetarian. I think that there are practical and emotional issues here and they sometimes overlap. There's questons of how far you (and he) want to cook two meals. With my mother I often made my main meal as her side dish and had to cook separately her meat or fish. This brings up two other questions: 1. how much you want to change his eating habits or just leave well alone for him deal with -- sounds like he's happy with his choices and you could just leave him to his meat and maybe waft a potato or two under his nose 2. how comfortable you are with dating a meat-eater, and in particular a meat-eater on his end of the scale? Sorry to come over all Hax-ish - but these are issues we veggies seem to face all the time. I'm a big foodie and I've given a lot of thought to what is and isn't important to me in my boyfriend's attitude towards eating.

Kim O'Donnel: You are absolutely on the mark, dear. Food is highly personal AND emotional, whether we realize it or not. With more and more vegetarians, this dilemma is becoming quite common. I'd have a really hard time with an unadventurous eater, for example. Or someone who preferred a drive-thru window over a farm market. These issues can be as important as other preferences, such as shoes, fingernails, body piercing, ain't easy.

For the carbotarian's girlfriend: As a reformed carbo-tarian myself (and having converted my bacon-and-'burgers boyfriend to a vegetarian)... would beans be an acceptable compromise to start with? Bean chili and bean burritos still have the starchy mouthfeel to them, but can be pretty healty. You can gradually add veggies from there/hide them in the chili.

Kim O'Donnel: Good point. And maybe grilled mushrooms as well...or some treatment with eggs

Mama Kiki: He eats a lot of pizza. I'm trying to change his eating habits. I'm getting him to eat more tofu and rice. Any suggestions? This is the first time I found this site and I'm so excited to get some many great ideas!

Kim O'Donnel: Mama Kiki, just so you know, you can't change your man. EVER. You can show him a few tricks and maybe he'll come along. But if you think you can change him, you're gonna be disappointed. If he eats lots of pizza, maybe you two could learn how to make dough together. I have a recipe/how-to that might be of interest. Pizza doesn't have to be junky. If he likes tofu, maybe add just one kind of veg in there. Thinly sliced carrots, for instance, something that most finicky eaters don't take issue with. Tofu is fun on skewers by the way, and tastes great grilled.

Men who won't eat veggies!: My question isn't so much "What's with these men?" as it is, "How did their mothers raise them their whole childhood without ever having them eat vegetables? And why are -we- made to suffer for it?!"

Kim O'Donnel: We're living in interesting times. If you're in your 30s or 40s, and you grew up in this country, there's a good chance you didn't learn how to cook from your mom. I didn't. She was sucked into the marketing magic of instant mashed potatoes and frozen Bird's Eye combinations and meatballs out of a can. I didn't have fresh broccoli until I was 18. Seriously. So now, with a changing social climate, in which this generation is learning as adults all about exotic mushrooms and fancy olive oil and sea salt, we're caught in a conundrum. We were weaned on fast food and many of us still are; people think you're a snob if you go to a farm market. These are growing pains and ones that I think eventually will dissipate.

Re: Food and Long-Term Compatability: There's a great thread at right now about food being the new sex- specifically about how eating preferences and food compatability is what will keep the relationship going even after some other passions have lessened.

Kim O'Donnel: Thanks. Will have to check it out. I remember when I made soup for someone I was dating years ago. He had a bad cold and I transported all of my goodies on the Metro. When he dipped into the soup, which I so lovingly prepared, he told me something in the soup was undercooked. That was the end of the relationship.

Non-Veggie Boyfriend: I am in a (vaguely) similar end of the spectrum as the reader with a non-veggie boyfriend. I have five housemates, and one does not eat veggies, although he will try one bite on occasion (to say nothing of the girl who hates all non-green beans, though she has never tasted them). I cook most of the meals for the whole house and have had success with:
Root veggies, as they resemble potatoes -- turnips, celeriac, parsnip and carrots snuck into pureed potato leek soup, in stews and roasted (turnips look deceptively like potatoes when grilled).
Paella type dishes where veggies are cut small and melt into the rice. Meat served on the side.
On the other hand, I think refusing to eat (or at least try) foods you don't like is a sign of a closed mind.

Kim O'Donnel: Thanks, great ideas for one-on-ones as well as group settings...

This was the conversation I had in a chat room on It started innocently enough. Then I started getting relationship advice, people started telling me about food and sex and basically saying that The Cop is a freak (and he is in more ways than one). I just wanted some recipes so I could feed my man! However, I have to say that I got really excited because all of a sudden the chat room focused on me and my dilemma. And you know how Kiki likes to be the center of attention! That’s all I have to say.

Monday, September 26, 2005 

If you want it done right...

Just one thing to say. If you want something done right, get an Eastern European who speaks little to no english to do it.

I went in for my wax today after work. I went to a new place. Basically I'm going everywhere in town to figure out who does the best job for the best price. I found her today. She was wonderful. Wasn't chatty. I was in and out in 25 minutes. Minimal pain. I went to a white girl last time. She was good and thorough. But it took her an hour and I had no feeling in my lower regions for 2 days. I told my new lady that I was impressed. She remarked, "I'm from Russia and I've been doing this for 20 years. I do a good job."

And she did.


Waiting for you to post is like waiting for your favorite show to come on, and then it gets cancelled for a golf match

Wow! People are actually reading my blog. And by people, I mean Roomie. I was royally disciplined this afternoon for not blogging. I’ll try to be more consistent. At least I’m not this guy.

Thank you for your concern about my dilemma. After consulting with a couple girlfriends, I decided to do the mature thing and talk to The Cop about me going out for a drink with Smitty.

I decided to ask him in person. It’s easier to gauge what a person is feeling when you can read their body language and facial expressions. I was in Detroit on Friday night. I was invited to a blues
concert by a lady I worked with a couple months ago. Anyway, it gave me a nice excuse to go and see The Cop after the concert.

It was nice to be over there and have nowhere to be the next morning. When I spent the night last weekend, we both had to get up early and get to work. But this weekend we got to just relax and chill and eat
Honeycombs & Kellogg's Honey Smacks with chocolate soy milk. It was before that that I decided to pop the question.

“So…I have a ….question to…ask you.” Fortunately The Cop is very patient. It literally took me a whole five minutes to spit out that one sentence. I told him that an ex-boyfriend emailed me and asked if we could go and have a drink. The Cop said nothing. So I continued telling him that I had taken the initiative and invited Smitty out when I first moved but he never took me up on the offer. Now that it was a convenient time for him, he wanted to do something with me. Still nothing from The Cop. So, I told The Cop, I wanted to put myself in The Cop’s position. How would I feel if one of his skank ex-girlfriends wanted to get together with him for a drink? I would appreciate it if The Cop told me, and I would probably let him go. Still no response. So I finished telling The Cop that I thought about who was important in my life at that moment. And I came to the conclusion that The Cop was more important. But, if The Cop told me he didn’t want me to see Smitty, I wouldn’t. Because The Cop was more important to me anyway. At that point, The Cop rolled on his side and put his arm around me and gave me a huge squeeze. He told me that he was secure in himself and he trusted me to have a drink with Smitty…so long as it was just a drink. And that was it. It was that simple.

I took my time emailing Smitty and I didn’t respond to his email until this afternoon. He hasn’t responded yet, and knowing him, he’ll probably flake. And that’s ok. Because I know that no matter what happens, whether we make plans or not, I’ve got a man who’s secure enough to let me go, cause he knows I’ll come back.

Thursday, September 22, 2005 

Should I stay or should I go?

It's ok to have a drink with your ex-boyfriend, right?

Smitty emailed. He sent his first email on Tuesday night and I was very proud of myself because his email didn't put butterflies in my tummy. It was his normal 4 sentence long email. He talked about the game and asked how I was doing. I responded and he replied back today. This time he asked about The Dungeon and reminded me that I owed him a drink. I responded back and told him that I owe him nothing. And his last reply was that he'd treat since I was young, poor, and had no friends, and asked me to name a date and time.

I have no problem meeting Smitty. In fact, Roomie and I discussed Smitty last night. However, I'm not sure if I should agree to meet him, and if so, do I tell The Cop?

I'm also not sure if I'm extremely entirely over Smitty. When I think about The Cop, I really like him. However, The Cop can't provide me with the things that Smitty can. Namely money and power. The Cop isn't as educated or as well connected as Smitty. However, Smitty is a workaholic and I always picture myself being one of those trophy wives with him who drives a Mercedes and drinks during the day (and I'm not saying that's a bad thing!).

But The Cop makes me feel good. He cares about me. He looks after me. He protects me. He's interested in me, what I do, what I think. He's a great lover...And I feel power over him. I'm more educated than him, I come from a better family than his (and if you know my background, that's pretty hard to accomplish....Kipper if you say ANYTHING I will string you up by your toes!).

And although I have stronger feelings for The Cop than I do for Smitty, I just sometimes feel that Smitty is the more PC choice.

So, I don't really like to get advise, but I'm asking you now. Should I go have a drink with Smitty, and if I do, do I tell The Cop?

Tuesday, September 20, 2005 

We are ND

So I take it that folks have been a little disappointed that I have not blogged in a while.

This weekend was the ND/MSU game. Yes we lost. It’s taken me three days to allow myself to say that MSU played a good game. Now, on to the drunken stories.

It was pretty much a tame weekend. Tiffy came up from ATL to visit. We finished a handle of vodka between the two of us. I got a ticket to the game. I saw tons of people including but not limited to Kipper, Frenchie, the PE girls. I was really excited to see the PE girls. It’s been a long time. I was disappointed that Roomie couldn’t come, but there’re always other games!

On Sunday Tiffy and I went to
the mall to go to The Apple Store among other things. I had totally forgotten about Old Man, and Tiffy suggested we call him. I wanted a free lunch…which he totally provided. I had given him Tiffy’s information in the past, so he was more than excited to meet her. We actually had a nice lunch. Tiffy and I were charming. Lunch went south when Tiff and I joked that we sometimes worked the corner and we charged different prices. What started out as a joke turned into a very uncomfortable conversation in P.F. Chang’s with Old Man listing several sexual acts and asking how much we would charge. The whole time I know he was wanting the two of us to start making out at the table.

After taking Tiff to her Aunt’s house in Detroit, I swung by The Cop’s house. I really had no intention to spend the night because I had a really busy Monday, but I brought some clothes along just in case. When we were at Chang’s we ordered some vegetarian stuff that I took home to The Cop. He was skeptical of the Tofu, but he really liked it. He didn’t eat the vegetables in the tofu because the man doesn’t eat vegetables. I know. Odd. We ended up watching
Crash. He wanted to know if I wanted to watch the movie downstairs or in the bedroom. I remarked, “Let’s watch it downstairs…I actually want to see this movie.” Because I’m a whore and I can’t watch a movie in bed with him without attacking him.

So that was my weekend. On Monday morning I drove from Detroit to Lansing for work and then back to Detroit 2 hours later for a meeting and then back to Lansing 2 hours after that to return to work. Phew!

Wednesday, September 07, 2005 

I can rest assured I'm not in a family way

I went to the gyno today. Mainly to get a refill on my poison. I think it's bogus that they make you go to the Dr. just to get a refill. I guess they want to make sure your uterus hasn't fallen out. Frankly, I think I could live my life without my uterus.

So I think my Dr. is gay. Or at least a caffine addict. He was really entergetic but very nice and didn't have a ring. I didn't know what to think. I've always liked having a male as a gyno. I've never had a woman, but I feel that men are more gentle. They really don't know what it's like down there, so they try to be extra careful. And they tend to warm the insturments.

What I didn't like about my Dr. was toward the end of the exam. He was checking to make sure all my vitals were in place and at the end he says, "And this is your baldder. And if I apply pressure (he applies pressure) it makes you want to pee." I sat up extra fast. Ok, that's just a cruel joke to play on a woman who's in the most vulerable position she could ever be in and not being able to really enjoy it.

So now here's my PSA. I asked my Dr. to write me a RX for
Plan B. It's the baby killer pill. Well, it's the abortion pill. I read in a magazine that you should have the RX filled ahead of time so if you ever find youself in a family way (and that's not your intention) you don't have to run around town looking for a pharmacist with less morals than you to fill your Rx. You just say, "Oh my, I think I may be preggers and I don't want to be." You open your medicine cabinet, take your pill that you've filled in advance, and say a prayer that God doesn't strike you dead. Cause that's what I plan on doing.

Thursday, September 01, 2005 

You might be a lesbian if..... tell your neighbors you're a lesbian.

I learned something about myself tonight. I like to be a private person. This may be why I have very few friends. I don't like too many people knowing what's going on with Kiki. I think that's why I lie. And I was so eager to imply that I'm a big Lez. It went down like this:

I was talking to one of my neighbors in his yard. I'd met his wife and I talk to her regularly, but I've never talked to him. We chit chatted for a while when he asked me if I had a boyfriend. My first response was, "Do you think you know me well enough to ask such a personal question?" He replied that he had been talking to me for a few minutes, so yes. And my response was, "Well, how do you know I'm not a lesbian?" He said that he's friends with gay people (the typical some of my best friends are black response) and he didn't care if i was a lez or not. So then he asked me if I had a girlfriend and I just gave him a devious smile.

I'm not sure why I lie. I just don't like people getting too close to me or knowing my business. Especially people who I live near. We can wave and say hello to each other in passing, but that's as far as it goes. Plus, I like to give people something to talk about!

About me

  • I'm young, single, got a great ass, a serial dater, a sometimes drunk, addicted to the gym, liable to make fat girls cry, have a mild ED, think Notre Dame is the greatest college and Texas is the greatest state. Currently at a standstill since moving from Detroit Area, Michigan (tons of yuppies) to Mason, MI (noted KKK presence). Come be a part of my random, shocking, and exciting world.
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