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Sunday, July 10, 2005 

A bi guy, my neighbor, and a guy I refuse to fuck

Last night I had a drink with a closeted bi man. He's an atty, older, and not really my type, but I figured I had nothing else going on on a Saturday night. Why not?

Steve sat at the bar with me and we had a drink. I couldn't believe he was bi or even experimented at all. He looked kinda uncomfortable in our bar surrounding, he was overweight, balding, and his shirt had his top button undone. I could see a mass of grey hair. I made some small talk with him, but when I sensed that he was uncomfortable, I tuned him out and started watching the tennis match on TV over his shoulder. He tried to make conversation about politics, and that's when I stopped him and told him that I didn't speak politics/religion while drinking. Meanwhile I had been making eye contact with the three guys sitting next to Steve. Two of the guys left, and the third guy, Will, butted into our conversation. I gave him a bit of hell for it a first but was secretly glad that someone else joined the boring conversation. Will's friend Jim soon joined us and we were a foursome.

I knew there was something not right about Steve when we started talking about aliens. And how he believed they existed. Will and Jim humored him for a while, but it seemed a bit like we were in high school, egging on the weird kid, just to laugh at him later behind his back. I had a pretty good time with the other boys, though. Will tried to bet me $100 that I was older than him (he was 25). I went with it. I knew he didn't have the money, and I wanted to try my bluffing skills. He was really torn. He had $70 in his pocket and wanted to try to make the bet with that, but I told him the terms were $100. Plus, in all reality, Kiki didn't have $100 to lose!

So by the time I get home, I see that my neighbor's friend's car is sitting in the parking lot. I call my neighbor and tell him I'm standing outside his door. He tells me that he and Chris are downtown, but will be home in 30mins. He said he'd send Chris over. Already I wasn't liking this situation. Chris must have told my neighbor I made a pass at him last time, and because Chris was to dumb to take me up, my neighbor was determined to get us together. Sorry. You only get one chance at Kiki. If you're foolish enough to pass it up, you don't get another try.

When the boys didn't arrive in 20mins, I got ready for bed and climbed into bed. Then they came over with drinks. My neighbor "conveniently" forgot his drink at his place (literally 10 steps away from my front door) which left Chris and I together. We had a nice chat a first. We sat on the couch drinking and talking. I reiterated that I only deal with boys over 30 (Chirs is 23). He told me I should go to Okemos for the professional over 30 scene. Thanks Chris! In the back of my mind I was wondering how he planned to make a pass at me. At first we were sitting on the couch face to face. That would have been a great opportunity. Then I suggested a movie. He agreed and then sat on the opposite end of the couch spread out with his feet facing mine. Well I grabbed a blanket and covered up. The top part of his body was no where near mine. It's 3:30 am at this point and he tells me he has to get up at 5 to go fishing with his neighbor. I suggestively ask if he plans on going to sleep or staying up the entire time. He missed his mark and said he'd probably go to sleep but he didn't want to go back to his friend's place. What? I was done with him. I gave him 2 options. Well, you can stay and watch the movie with me, or you can go back to your friend's apt and get some shut eye. Confused, he got up and asked me to tuck him in at his friend's house. Really. He did. I made a crazy face at him and told him I was comfortable and I didn't plan on walking across the hall to 'tuck him in.' Then I added, I could have tucked you in the last time you were here but you passed that up. hehe. Bitch, I know.

So Chris left and went to my neighbor's. I was looking at Chris last night. He's very attractive. Dark hair, blue eyes, nice tan, white teeth, nice arms. Looks like a mini Abercrombie model. But I think the fact that he's socially awkward with me turns me off. I'm mean, if he's this awkward with our clothes on, I can imagine how awkward it may be with our clothes off. Plus, I don't do guys under 30!

i hate clueless boys sometimes. they're too much of an easy mark.

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About me

  • I'm young, single, got a great ass, a serial dater, a sometimes drunk, addicted to the gym, liable to make fat girls cry, have a mild ED, think Notre Dame is the greatest college and Texas is the greatest state. Currently at a standstill since moving from Detroit Area, Michigan (tons of yuppies) to Mason, MI (noted KKK presence). Come be a part of my random, shocking, and exciting world.
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